I think one piece of advice that continually seems to be spewed at us, no matter what stage of life we find ourselves in, is to keep moving forward. 

Don’t dwell on the past.

Live in the present.

Accept yourself.

All great advice, don’t get me wrong. But sometimes, what a person needs is a push to look at who they were and who they are now and decide if they’ve become a better person along the way. If you’re not happy with yourself, then you have the capacity to change that (of course, I mean that in the healthiest way possible).

Looking back on who I was two or three years ago compared to who I am now, I think I’ve changed a lot. For a lack of a better word, I’ve mellowed. Which isn’t a bad thing, honestly. Back when I was on the edge of puberty and having wild nights sleeping at 10:30 pm, I was a ball of stress. However, I was an efficient ball of stress.

What I want to do now, as I approach college and life and the beyond, is get rid of all those nasty habits I’ve developed over the years while still trying to be who I am now. It may not make complete sense, but there are so many habits that I took for granted that I really need now. It’s almost like I was more prepared to be an adult when I was 14 than I am now. Back then, I was never tardy, always did my homework in advance, had a solid 8 hours of sleep, and even had time to read FOR FUN. And it wasn’t like I didn’t have any of the hobbies I do now… It’s more that I was so strict and developed into this routine that I naturally was able to accomplish so much in one day.

In short, I want a reset button. Or more accurately, I want to make a reset button for myself. Nothing too crazy, but I figure that I can go from being a complete mess 99% of the time to say…60% of the time.

Wish me luck?

-FangirlingForGood

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